Blossom - Bonnie
December 27, 2010
My name is Bonnie and I'm 55 years old. I'm a tall 5' 6". I am married to a wonderful man since 1983, and have been blessed with three amazing children. My oldest is 22, her younger sister will be 19 on my 6th month anniversary of being a SOPER and my son will turn 14 this month as well. I currently live in Rockville, Maryland which is a suburb of Washington DC. I have been here for more than 10 years (actually almost 30) so that makes me a native in this community.
My screen name Blossom, is a camp name I used when I was a unit leader at Girl Scout Camp. I liked the name, because blossom is both a noun and verb. Blossoms are either a singular flower or a cluster of flowers. It is also the act of flowering or growing. I think it fits perfectly with my life, both in and out of Weight Watchers.
Originally, I'm from St. Louis, Missouri which is where I joined WW for the first time as a pre-teen (when I first joined, they didn't have a separate program for teens). I never made it to goal on that first jaunt, but I did lose about 20 lbs before my Bat Mitzvah and I did change some behaviors...for the rest of my life. That's when I learned to drink diet soda, and pull the skin off of the chicken. Behaviors were changed and never reversed. I think I was within a pound of goal, and never made it to lifetime. I continued to struggle with my weight during high school; but more than anything I think I struggled with body image. At 5'6, I was never going to be petite.
After Graduate school, I did my clinical fellowship year In Tampa, (1982) I returned again to WW, attending meetings sometimes twice a week, and working out. My time was my own. My focus was ME. It had been about 13 years since my teenage membership. This journey got me within 6 pounds of goal. But I never made goal. I returned to St. Louis. Shortly thereafter I met my soon to be husband, and within a year we were married. I hadn't yet gained all my weight back..during the year of our engagement, but I had put back about 20 lbs before the wedding.
Over the next 4 ½ years I struggled with my weight. When I got pregnant with daughter #1, I was at 180 lbs...and the midwives I had chosen were hassling me about my weight, threatening to risk me out of the birthing center. When my daughter arrived I was over 220 lbs. Her delivery left me very depressed about my future and my ability to have more children. Losing weight was not on the agenda.
After a great deal of research and soul searching, I entertained the idea of a subsequent pregnancy, but promised myself I would get the weight off first. I wasn't going to enter into a relationship with a care provider with the red flag of obesity being part of my co-morbidity.
So I went back to WW, and lost the pregnancy weight, getting close to goal, but not close enough. With significant weight lost, I was ready to be pregnant. A subsequent pregnancy found me delivering this time at 230 lbs. My 2nd daughter had a complicated first year of life, and there was no motivation for me to take care of me. I never lost the weight. Four years later, I found myself starting another pregnancy in the 230 range...and delivering that 10 lb 4 oz baby at around 270ish.
I had 3 children, working two part time jobs; I just struggled to find time to make me a priority.
I was so busy in their lives. I toyed with going back to WW...tried to lose weight on my own, but I never persevered to be successful.
My most recent journey began in September of 2006. At that point, I made the commitment to join WW for the Last time. I was at my highest 'documented' weight. Whether I followed the program or not, WW was going to continue to bill my credit card, until I either got to goal, or died. At that point, my youngest was 9, and my oldest had just left for college. I was not going to fill out the rejoin card again. EVER. My progress since joining had been very inconsistent.
My attendance at meetings was inconsistent, and my credit card was consistently being billed. From September of 06 to Feb of 08 I lost almost 25 pounds. When I would go to meetings, I would lose. But I wasn't consistent. I also discovered the Binge Enders Challenge on line. It was very helpful to me to begin to look at my binging behaviors more intensely. But what did joining for the last time mean? IT meant I opened a door to all the weaknesses I possessed...and my repeated inconsistent behaviors. I knew this program worked. I've known it since I was 11 years old. So what was between me and my own success?
An important learning lesson came for me in October of 2009. My then leader asked us to write down a plan for Jan 5, 2010. Did we want to weigh “less, more or the same” come the new year? ” She told us to look at the holidays in front of us (Halloween, Thanksgiving and Xmas/Chanukah) and decide. I chose
“wanting to weigh less” and really stayed focused during the holidays. I lost weight and I never forgot the power I felt, losing while all around me were gaining, as I toasted in the New Year with seltzer water.
I started off 2010 strong, but I felt myself fade as the year progressed...or so I thought. Throughout the year, my leader made a conscious effort to send me post cards when I missed 3 meetings. I continued to go to meetings although my efforts at weight loss were negligible. It was a crazy year with significant life changing events. At some point during the year, I realized that my weight had never gone out of a 10 lb range all year. I had gone up and down within 5 lbs of where I started the year. BUT I HAD NOT GAINED MY WEIGHT BACK + 10 lbs. That's my normal pattern. I called this “hanging out behavior” “premature maintenance.” I figured if I could hang out at 275 lbs for a year ...maybe I could really get to goal and hang out at goal. I started processing this change in Sept of 2010. A few weeks later, the new Points Plus program came out...and I struggled to learn it as the holidays approached. I wasn't losing as well on Points Plus as previous plans. But I did love the 0 point fruits and veggies.
It was autumn. I was really wanting to repeat that 3 month journey of “choosing to lose weight over the holidays” as I had done the year prior although I was nervous with Points Plus. The scale was just not moving. As I looked for support around the WW boards, it appeared that most people around me were falling apart over the holidays, giving in, giving up, or making excuses. I was disturbed and frustrated.
In late December of 2010 I ran across the Seriously on Plan (Sopers) thread and asked if I could join.
Initially I struggled as a SOPER because I was operating out of the notion that I could follow the current WW guidelines and still be Seriously on Plan while participating on the thread. The comments coming at me, were tough to take. These folks didn't know me! I could be a WW and follow the plan...Seriously. I came to learn, that this particular SOPer thread, and their incredible success was due in part to their own rules and the tweaking of the Weight Watcher plan for weight loss. I bought in. When I joined the Sopers in late December of 2010 I was approximately 18 lbs from my highest WI in 2006 of 291.4. I am posting this as my 6th month anniversary as a Soper and I am reporting a loss of 40 + lbs.
I am very grateful to Leather, and the Stompers who not only share this plan with others, but support us along the way with their modeling, mentoring and successes and tough love. I don't think I've ever had such weight loss success with WW or any other program, and been so totally satisfied (i.e., not hungry) at the same time.
It I am so excited to be making this SOPER experience as a part of my final journey as a WW. It is giving me the solid base that I need, and the roots to personalize my own program and food choices, so I know I can fly. It is allowing me the space to explore my own weaknesses and fallacious thought processes involving food in a safety net of tough love. I also know that the child who lives inside of me, is desperate for appropriate eating models. How else will I learn to break out of the mold and think like a thin person thinks?
My screen name Blossom, is a camp name I used when I was a unit leader at Girl Scout Camp. I liked the name, because blossom is both a noun and verb. Blossoms are either a singular flower or a cluster of flowers. It is also the act of flowering or growing. I think it fits perfectly with my life, both in and out of Weight Watchers.
Originally, I'm from St. Louis, Missouri which is where I joined WW for the first time as a pre-teen (when I first joined, they didn't have a separate program for teens). I never made it to goal on that first jaunt, but I did lose about 20 lbs before my Bat Mitzvah and I did change some behaviors...for the rest of my life. That's when I learned to drink diet soda, and pull the skin off of the chicken. Behaviors were changed and never reversed. I think I was within a pound of goal, and never made it to lifetime. I continued to struggle with my weight during high school; but more than anything I think I struggled with body image. At 5'6, I was never going to be petite.
After Graduate school, I did my clinical fellowship year In Tampa, (1982) I returned again to WW, attending meetings sometimes twice a week, and working out. My time was my own. My focus was ME. It had been about 13 years since my teenage membership. This journey got me within 6 pounds of goal. But I never made goal. I returned to St. Louis. Shortly thereafter I met my soon to be husband, and within a year we were married. I hadn't yet gained all my weight back..during the year of our engagement, but I had put back about 20 lbs before the wedding.
Over the next 4 ½ years I struggled with my weight. When I got pregnant with daughter #1, I was at 180 lbs...and the midwives I had chosen were hassling me about my weight, threatening to risk me out of the birthing center. When my daughter arrived I was over 220 lbs. Her delivery left me very depressed about my future and my ability to have more children. Losing weight was not on the agenda.
After a great deal of research and soul searching, I entertained the idea of a subsequent pregnancy, but promised myself I would get the weight off first. I wasn't going to enter into a relationship with a care provider with the red flag of obesity being part of my co-morbidity.
So I went back to WW, and lost the pregnancy weight, getting close to goal, but not close enough. With significant weight lost, I was ready to be pregnant. A subsequent pregnancy found me delivering this time at 230 lbs. My 2nd daughter had a complicated first year of life, and there was no motivation for me to take care of me. I never lost the weight. Four years later, I found myself starting another pregnancy in the 230 range...and delivering that 10 lb 4 oz baby at around 270ish.
I had 3 children, working two part time jobs; I just struggled to find time to make me a priority.
I was so busy in their lives. I toyed with going back to WW...tried to lose weight on my own, but I never persevered to be successful.
My most recent journey began in September of 2006. At that point, I made the commitment to join WW for the Last time. I was at my highest 'documented' weight. Whether I followed the program or not, WW was going to continue to bill my credit card, until I either got to goal, or died. At that point, my youngest was 9, and my oldest had just left for college. I was not going to fill out the rejoin card again. EVER. My progress since joining had been very inconsistent.
My attendance at meetings was inconsistent, and my credit card was consistently being billed. From September of 06 to Feb of 08 I lost almost 25 pounds. When I would go to meetings, I would lose. But I wasn't consistent. I also discovered the Binge Enders Challenge on line. It was very helpful to me to begin to look at my binging behaviors more intensely. But what did joining for the last time mean? IT meant I opened a door to all the weaknesses I possessed...and my repeated inconsistent behaviors. I knew this program worked. I've known it since I was 11 years old. So what was between me and my own success?
An important learning lesson came for me in October of 2009. My then leader asked us to write down a plan for Jan 5, 2010. Did we want to weigh “less, more or the same” come the new year? ” She told us to look at the holidays in front of us (Halloween, Thanksgiving and Xmas/Chanukah) and decide. I chose
“wanting to weigh less” and really stayed focused during the holidays. I lost weight and I never forgot the power I felt, losing while all around me were gaining, as I toasted in the New Year with seltzer water.
I started off 2010 strong, but I felt myself fade as the year progressed...or so I thought. Throughout the year, my leader made a conscious effort to send me post cards when I missed 3 meetings. I continued to go to meetings although my efforts at weight loss were negligible. It was a crazy year with significant life changing events. At some point during the year, I realized that my weight had never gone out of a 10 lb range all year. I had gone up and down within 5 lbs of where I started the year. BUT I HAD NOT GAINED MY WEIGHT BACK + 10 lbs. That's my normal pattern. I called this “hanging out behavior” “premature maintenance.” I figured if I could hang out at 275 lbs for a year ...maybe I could really get to goal and hang out at goal. I started processing this change in Sept of 2010. A few weeks later, the new Points Plus program came out...and I struggled to learn it as the holidays approached. I wasn't losing as well on Points Plus as previous plans. But I did love the 0 point fruits and veggies.
It was autumn. I was really wanting to repeat that 3 month journey of “choosing to lose weight over the holidays” as I had done the year prior although I was nervous with Points Plus. The scale was just not moving. As I looked for support around the WW boards, it appeared that most people around me were falling apart over the holidays, giving in, giving up, or making excuses. I was disturbed and frustrated.
In late December of 2010 I ran across the Seriously on Plan (Sopers) thread and asked if I could join.
Initially I struggled as a SOPER because I was operating out of the notion that I could follow the current WW guidelines and still be Seriously on Plan while participating on the thread. The comments coming at me, were tough to take. These folks didn't know me! I could be a WW and follow the plan...Seriously. I came to learn, that this particular SOPer thread, and their incredible success was due in part to their own rules and the tweaking of the Weight Watcher plan for weight loss. I bought in. When I joined the Sopers in late December of 2010 I was approximately 18 lbs from my highest WI in 2006 of 291.4. I am posting this as my 6th month anniversary as a Soper and I am reporting a loss of 40 + lbs.
I am very grateful to Leather, and the Stompers who not only share this plan with others, but support us along the way with their modeling, mentoring and successes and tough love. I don't think I've ever had such weight loss success with WW or any other program, and been so totally satisfied (i.e., not hungry) at the same time.
It I am so excited to be making this SOPER experience as a part of my final journey as a WW. It is giving me the solid base that I need, and the roots to personalize my own program and food choices, so I know I can fly. It is allowing me the space to explore my own weaknesses and fallacious thought processes involving food in a safety net of tough love. I also know that the child who lives inside of me, is desperate for appropriate eating models. How else will I learn to break out of the mold and think like a thin person thinks?